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The women who wrote this article lives in Washington DC and is getting ready to move to Poland.
However many times I had to say it, the words never sounded natural. “What does your husband do?” the nice woman in the carpool line or the pleasant man at the cocktail party would ask, and I’d try to toss it off lightly: “Well, actually, he’s the defense minister of Poland.”
Then the nice woman or the pleasant man would look at me slightly cross-eyed, trying to guess whether I was serious. After they had worked out that I was indeed completely serious, they would demand explanations. “How on earth did that happen?” was a frequent question, as if the answer might involve some mysterious deus ex machina or a coup d’etat, nothing so dull as a democratic election. “Oh, that must be terribly difficult,” was a common commiseration — as if we were discussing a great tragedy. But my favorite reaction by far — and it was by no means unusual — came from the people who wrinkled their foreheads and asked:
“Is that a job you can do in Washington?”
Well, no, being Polish defense minister isn’t a job you can do in Washington.
I know Poland isn’t Ukraine. I try to read news stories about Ukraine and the surrounding countries; Poland, Slovakia, Hungary, Romania, Moldovia, Russia, Belarus and the unrecognised country Transdniester . Transdniester is also referred to as the insurgent Trans-Dniester region.
Anyway… the story really tickled my funny bone. Hopefully you find it as funny.
As I was reading it, it tied to an adoption related thought. People don’t know how to response to unexpected events.
If they don’t need to “fight or flight”, then they fall back to an “uncensored by common sense and politeness” response. For example:
Woman (announcing adoption plans to family): I plan to adopt a child from Ukraine.
(long pause)
Brother: Did you know that you can buy sperm and make a baby?
Just want every woman wants… A conversation about sperm.
I strongly believe now in announcing major events in writing first. Then I don’t have to hear the “uncensored by common sense and politeness” response.
