My daughter Natasha was adopted from Ukraine when she was 3.5 years old. And for some reason today.... I asked her what she thought was an important topic concerning Ukrainian adoption.

Her answer:

You have to do lots of paperwork... the process... the procedures.

And then you have to travel on a plane.

And then you do more paperwork to complete the adoption.

But then.... after a while... that is when love grows. That is the important part.

My darling is a smart cookie.... more

By this time many folks have read the Alone again news story. Jeff and Michelle Bignell adopted 2 children from Ukraine in March 2001. They adopted a 7 year old boy and 4 year old girl.

Let's call the boy S.

The Bignell family felt like they couldn't cope with S's many mental/developmental issues. He broke his sister's ankles, ran away and killed pets. So we aren't talking about small issues. Feb 2005, S was... more

You probably wouldn't guess just by looking at this picture..... You are looking at the strongest willed person on the planet. This is Natasha at 3.5 years of age. She was black - hole - sucking - everything - in - and - not - letting - light - out strong willed.

She came home developmentally delayed in all ways; emotionally, gross motor skills, language. She was a walking talking puzzle of different developmental ages.

But one thing that she was absolutely clear on. She was the boss. She ran things.

At first when she got angry at me, she would show a... more

I love NPR's This American Life show. But somehow I missed a great episode.

If you have broadband access you have to listen to this show.

Act 1 is about a family who adopted a child from Romania. This child spent the majority of his time in a crib... 7.5 YEARS. Then an American family adopted him

There was a brief honeymoon where the child tried to act perfect. But then he displayed all his pain and rage. The child put... more

Dr Brothers' said something like... adopted younger children will be less impacted by loss then older children. I have never found that to be true. They cannot communicate as well, but young children are very familiar with loss. And they do remember.

My earliest memories are when I was 18 months old. It was the night that my youngest brother was born. And the next day when my family went to the hospital... more

Some adoptive parents receive advice that the younger a child is adopted, the fewer issues they potentially will have. At least this has been my life experience for the last 6 years. I adopted my darling daughter from Ukraine in 2000 and have mostly stayed involved with the adoption community.

I don't believe this is a good thing to say and I have heard it a few too many times. Children under 3 year of age are impacted by institutionalization. Children older then 3 years are impacted by institutionalization.... more

OK, I figured out why I was bugged by the word "best" in Dr. Joyce Brothers, International Adoption is Not For Everyone quiz.

Here is the question with "best". Dr Brothers stated the answer to this question was true. I strongly believe it is false.

2. It is best to adopt children who are very young -- under 2 or 3 years old -- because the institutional living... more

I ran across the quiz by Dr. Joyce Brothers, International Adoption is Not For Everyone from the Seattle Post-Intelligencer. I found it because of Erin's blog and Adrienne's blog.

One of... more

Just a recap..... I read a post on FRUA. A family was asking how children learn or don't learn language. Their child had been home for 6 weeks.

I looked at old emails and journal entries. Natasha had been home for 2 months before I noticed her usage of English was improving.

What I didn't know at that point was just how delayed her language skills were. Her language skills were screened after she had been home for 6 months. She was 4 years... more

I read the same thread on FRUA that Nancy Spoolstra did. The thread was about internationally adopted children and how quickly they do or do not start learning English.

She wrote Mi Casa es Mi Castillo.

Nancy wrote:

While I completely agree some kids have language and processing issues, and... more